What if...

What if we all acted like Brett Favre? What if every year we waffled with a decision to retire? What if we decided to miss the prep meetings and hours of work, only to show up for the big meeting and take all the glory?

I'll tell you what... people would get pissed. Really pissed. And no work would get done. And no one would want to work with you because you didn't want to put in the time for the team. Really, that's all Favre is doing. I personally think he feels he is too good to go to preseason camp and sweat his ass off in practice. I think he feels he's been playing in the NFL for 20 years and doesn't have to do all of that anymore. Well, #4, in my opinion, you are dead wrong.

Brett, you are a talented player, one of the best quarterbacks the game has evern seen. You will certainly be a Hall of Famer, when you ever decide to retire and become eligible. But let me tell you, Grandpa, you keep making PR mistakes that are costing you your fans. Sure, Minnesota fans love you.... you almost took them to the Super Bowl. But need I remind you that you alienated an entire state, yes state, because everyone in Wisconsin is a Packer fan, the remainder of the Packer Nation, as well as New York Jets fans? How does that feel?

You could have handled your departure from the Packers much better.  Just retire with decency and move along living it up in Hattiesburg. But no, you had to go play for the Jets. Then retire. Again.

Then, you betrayed all of Packer Nation by becoming a part of their rivals, the Vikings. You had one of your best years ever and almost took them to the Super Bowl. The last we saw of you, you were really hurting physically and mentally. And the questions began... will he retire? Will he stay a Viking? Will he go somewhere else? Will he enjoy being a new grandfather? The Favre Watch began.

And in your typical fashion, you decided to waffle and come back one last time. It took some of your teammates coming down to Hattiesburg (gees, what is it with that town of late? Tiger goes there to sex rehab then the media circus of Favre. It must be a happening place) to get you to come back. Now, you say you were hurt and had surgery on your ankle. I believe you. I'm sure it hurt. But I also believe your ego and pride were more hurt than your ankle. I'm thinking you couldn't believe you didn't beat New Orleans, of all teams, to go to the Super Bowl. Even after your record breaking year. Then all hell froze over when the Saints actually won the Super Bowl. The great QB couldn't go back after that. Everyone would remember that game. So you waffled, as you have been prone to do these last few years, and even caused ESPN to create the Favre ticker, much to my chagrin. Your ego made you sit out the summer and wonder if you were coming back. Are you really that much of a baby? Do you really need the attention? Did you really need some of your teammates to come down to Hattiesburg to ask you to rejoin the team?

You finally gave the world your answer yesterday and surprise!!!! You are coming back to the NFL. Again. You missed the preseason practices and camps. Way to be a team player.

Now, I really don't care either way. I'm neither a Favre lover or hater. I certainly didn't have anything against him and won't deny that he is a spectacular football player. But come on, Brett, your ego is getting to be as big as LeBron's and Tiger's. And that's not good company to keep.

Worst. Breakup. Ever.

I’ve been through tough breakups before. We all have (unless you are one of those freaks who have never been dumped… that’s just not natural.) They’re not pretty. I’ve had a few bad ones myself. My high school boyfriend and I broke up 3 times. The first time, he broke up with me. I was devastated, depressed. Everything a 15 year old girl would be when she was dumped. After all, he broke up with me three weeks before Valentine’s Day. We got back together after a few weeks, then it was my turn to dump him. I think he took it better than me, but we ended up getting back together again, much to my parents’ chagrin. It lasted a few more months and then we both broke up with each other. Neither of us handled it well.

As an adult, I have had a few breakups and some went better than others. One was amicable and we are still friends to this day. The other, not so much. I was dumped and I decided to drown my sorrows (don’t we all?) I drowned my sorrows in an entire bottle of Gossamer Bay Zinfandel and boy did I pay for it. (Bear in mind I wasn’t a wine drinker then but I sure did guzzle that $6 bottle of wine.) It ended very badly. Of course, I drunk dialed and that led to me going to his house, becoming belligerent, yelling at him and then throwing up. A lot. At least I didn’t throw up on him. That was the last time I talked to him so I am quite sure he has a horrible lasting impression of me.


All in all, breakups are just bad. I’ve heard of breakups where car doors are keyed, houses are rolled with toiler paper, even baseball bats are taken to cars and their windshields. Now with Facebook and Twitter, it is bound to get even uglier. But never before have I seen the scorned burning jerseys in the streets. But then again, never before have a seen a breakup any worse than the one between LeBron James and the city of Cleveland.

Poor Cleveland Cavs fans. They now feel like that dumped, 15 year old slightly chubby girl sitting in her room listening to the radio relating every song to her breakup and her broken teenage love affair. I was that girl and I feel for them.



LeBron handled himself so poorly during this entire free agent process. At first, I didn’t blame him. I blamed the media for putting him on this pedestal. I even blogged about it. But now, I have changed my mind. LeBron acted like a spoiled, little rich kid, the self-proclaimed King, showing no regard for the city that has been with him, stood by him, and built an entire team around him. A city that lived and breathed LeBron and basketball. But no more.


When I first heard ESPN was holding a one-hour special entitled “The Decision,” I thought, at least he is doing it from the Boys and Girls Club in Greenwich, CT. (of course, I have to ask why Greenwich needs a Boys and Girls Club, I always thought it was full of rich people who commuted into NYC to work. Perhaps the organization is there to help kids whose parents make less than $200,000 a year, but I digress.) But seriously, this whole thing has been ridiculous. A media spectacle that can only be found in America.


I just wish he would have made his decision and put it out in a statement to the media like everyone else. I would have made him seem more humble. It would have been the classy way to go. Perhaps Cleveland fans wouldn’t have felt so betrayed. Instead, he had to drag it out for a week, having the media camp out on his doorstep, report on his every breath and leave poor Cavs fans on pins and needles.


Since the Bosh and Wade news was announced on Wednesday, the day prior to LeBron’s announcement, it seemed to be inevitable he would join them in Miami. He had played with them before in the Olympics and it was no secret they wanted to play on the same team. He should have just released a statement shortly after that saying he had made the decision to join his friends Bosh and Wade and the Miami Heat in the quest for an NBA Championship. That’s it. No more spectacle. It would have made him look more humble and less like an ego maniac. But no, he had to drag it out for 24 more hours and star in a special on ESPN.


I personally didn’t get to see “The Decision,” so I decided to read the transcripts from the interview with ESPN’s Jim Gray. Of course, I can’t just post it the way it was transcribed. I will break it down so you will know what LeBron really meant.


What have you thought about this process?

This process has been everything I've thought and more. And that's what I did a few years ago; I put myself in a position to have this process where I can hear teams' pitches and figure out what was the best possible chance for me to ultimately win and to ultimately be happy.

Translation: I love all of this attention. I’m an ego maniac. I want to win and be rich.

You weren't able to be recruited because you went straight to the NBA from high school. Have you enjoyed this recruiting process now?


I have enjoyed it. And I want to thank all six teams that I had an opportunity to sit down with and hear what they had to say. And my team, they hear what we had to say also.
It's been an unbelievable experience, a real humbling experience to be even to be in this position.

Translation: I’ve enjoyed every minute of the entire country, heck, world even, watching my every move. I’ve loved having a ticker on Sports Center. I’ve loved having media camp out in front of my Nike Skills Camp. I’ve loved having grown men beg me to come to their city. I’ve loved having President Obama beg me to come to Chicago. It is an ego maniac’s dream.



When did you decide?


I think I decided this morning. I mean, I decided this morning I went day to day. I wake up one morning, it's this team. I wake up another morning, it's this team. And it's a process that I felt it was I may feel like this is the best opportunity for me or not the best opportunity for me.


But this morning I woke up, had a great conversation with my mom. Once I had that conversation with her, I think I was set.


Translation: I’ve known all along I was going to Miami. I want to see how much people would beg and plead with me to stay in Cleveland or go to their city.



You've had everybody else biting their nails. So I guess it's time for them to stop chewing. The answer to the question everybody wants to know: LeBron, what's your decision?


In this fall, this is very tough, in this fall I'm going to take my talents to South Beach and join the Miami Heat.


Translation: This fall, I’m going to take my ego and powder down to Miami. I mean, who wouldn’t choose Miami over Cleveland???? Beautiful women, sandy beaches. Hell, it’s freakin’ cold in Cleveland.


Why?

Like I said before, I feel like it's going to give me the best opportunity to win and to win for multiple years, and not only just to win in the regular season or just to win five games in a row or three games in a row, I want to be able to win championships. And I feel like I can compete down there.


Translation: Being filthy rich just isn’t enough for me. I can’t win a championship by myself, being at Cleveland has proven that. I need more talented teammates.



How do you explain this to the people in Cleveland?


I mean, it's heartfelt for me. You know, it's hard to explain, but at the same time my heart, in the seven years I gave to that franchise, to that city, it was everything.

I mean, those 20,000 plus fans that came out every night we played, and they seen me grow from an 18 year old kid to a 25 year old man. And I never wanted to leave Cleveland. And my heart will always be around that area. But I also felt like this is the greatest challenge for me is to move on.


Translation: Suckers!!!!!!!!!!



What do you think will be the fans' reaction back there, and will you still live in Akron?

I'm not sure. You know, they can have mixed emotions, of course, but it's going to be a lot of emotions not understanding why. And then you're going to have the real friends who love me for who I am. For me being from Akron, Ohio, and loving Akron, Ohio, it's always home for me. I'm still going to live there, always be home. And Akron, Ohio is always home for me and that area.


Translation: I think the fans will still love me. I put the Cavs on the map. Of course, they will never be the same without me. I’m sure some folks will be mad at me, but that’s life. I’ll have a championship ring next year. Something Cleveland will never have. If I couldn’t give it to them, no one can. And will I still live in Akron? NO WAY! I'm gonna get me a sweet pad in South Beach.


For what it’s worth, I’m sorry about my behavior after that breakup. It was childish and immature. But it’s funny how things work out. If he hadn’t dumped me, I would never have met Tom and wouldn’t have the life I have now. So cheer up, Cavs fans. You never know where the road might lead.

It's Good to be the King

All I have to say is, “wow.” It must be good to be LeBron James. Now there is a LeBron ticker on ESPN. Everyone knows by now (unless you live in a hole) that King James is a free agent and he is being courted by several NBA teams. It is quite possibly the most pathetic display I’ve seen in sports in a long time, maybe ever. It is quite ridiculous how teams and entire cities are courting him. Grown men are singing songs about LeBron staying in their town or moving to their town. It is a frenzy that can only happen in American sports.

I don’t blame LeBron. He is a great basketball player and is trying to make the right decision. Sure, his decision is based mostly on money, and honestly, can you blame him? He made more money in endorsements the day he signed with Cleveland at 18 years of old than the majority of us will make in our entire lives. Besides, I guarantee you if someone offered you an obscene amount of money to do the job you loved to do, you would take it.

I blame the media for this frenzy. Everytime I turn on ESPN there is a new story speculating where LeBron will go. They've uncovered someone who claims to know something and is predicting LeBron will go here or stay there. They have a reporter camped out in front of his basketball camp in Akron, or in front of the office where he has been meeting with a team.

You have to imagine LeBron is enjoying this attention just a little bit. I mean, he’s got teams fighting over him, something we would all love to have happen to us. Put yourself in his shoes. Say you got a great job at Joe’s Corporation. You worked there a few years and made Joe’s a household name and improved their profit margins. Then, other companies began courting you. They flew you out to meet with them and showed you everything they could give you. It is obvious with all of the companies that you will be the top dog and you will get anything you want there. New desk? Check. Expense account? Check. Gourmet coffee? Check. New computer and iPhone? Check. Everything you need to do the best job you can do. What would you do? Would location play a factor? Would you still be loyal to Joe’s because it is where you got your start and happens to be located in your home state? Would you take a chance on a new company where there are new coworkers and a new boss/coach?

The big question now is just where will LeBron go? Will he stay in Cleveland? Will he go to Chicago? Miami? New York? Honestly, I don’t think it matters. His previous history with Cleveland has shown that one man – no matter how talented – cannot win a championship.