It Always Comes in Threes...

Here I am about 8 hours after surgery. 

It's day 4, post-surgery, and I'm feeling pretty good. I've certainly learned a lot over the last few days, mainly that my husband is the badass in my family and I'm not sure what I would do without him. He had a very trying day yesterday, so I want to give mad props to him for keeping it  -- and this family -- together. He is amazing.

They say it comes in threes, so here's hoping, we are done after last night. Allow me to recap.

1. The first is just normal post-surgery stuff. I was discharged late Wednesday night and boy, was I ready to get home. I didn't sleep well the nigh before in the hospital, I had to sit up all day in the chair and walk (I did that right after my surgery also) so I was ready to get in my own bed. Finally rolled into bed about 7 and went to sleep at 8:30 p.m. And boy, what a great sleep it was. I was very sore when I woke up Thursday morning, but very happy to see my own bedroom when I opened my eyes.

2. But then I heard something. At first, I thought it was me hearing things from the pain meds I had taken. It was a dripping noise. Then I thought it was something one of the boys was doing-one of them always has a ball, bottle or something they are pitching, flipping, juggling.
I walked out into the kitchen to a good portion of our kitchen ceiling on the floor due to a water heater leak directly upstairs. Water was everywhere.

Tripp sprang into action and go some buckets to catch the leak, and I went about my business and helped the kids navigate the wet kitchen for breakfast. Tom sprang into action and called the contractor to get it cleaned up as immediately as possible.

During all of this chaos, I tried to take my medicine for the first time. At the hospital, they do something so lovely and just put it in your iv. But now I'm home, and I'm on my own. As a gastric sleeve patient, it is important to remember that your stomach (or pouch as they call it) is only five ounces. So, you can't gulp or even take really big drinks, especially on day three. I have several meds to take each day-- synthroid, old school anti-anxiety Prozac and something to help with the stomach acid. If it is a pill, it has to be very small, or you can crush it or cut it up. I cut it up, but apparently not enough. After about 2 minutes of taking my meds, I threw up. Damn, it hurt.

I went back to bed for a couple of hours while my badass husband took care of everything in the house, including taking the kids to school, and at 9 a.m., he woke me up. It was time to rise and shine and sit up, do some walking and get down my 5 ounces every hour. (That doesn't seem hard, but it is VERY hard to do.) Since the plumber was there and we didn't have any hot water, he took me to my mom's to recuperate and take a shower. It was, possibly, one of the best showers I've ever had.

I walked, watched some Netflix, took a snooze and felt tons better.

3. It was a very busy night for Tripp and Zane last night with football, so we had some arranging to do. Tom also had to go to parents meeting at school for Tripp. He picked up Tripp, dropped off Zane and brought Tripp home to do homework. On his way back to Briarcrest to watch Zane in his first football scrimmage, he was in a little fender bender. Thankfully, no one was injured and the vehicles were drivable. But boy, what an end to a day!

 

Tom's truck is the one on the left.

 

 

Thankfully, everyone is fine and these are true #firstworldproblems if I've ever seen them. But still annoying nonetheless. And there is never a perfect time, but maybe it could have been a little better timed!?!

 

As I write this now, I have plumbers installing a new water heater and the sheetrock guys are fixing my kitchen. I'm working at getting down my 5 ounces each hour. I'm a bit sore in my stomach (I have 5 small incisions) and frankly, I have gas from them inserting the air into my stomach during the procedure. But everything is just fine.

 

It's so weird because I'm not hungry at all. I haven't had a bit of solid food since Sunday evening and I'm not hungry. I'm also trying not to freak out that my stomach is gone! (Holy crap!!!!) Well, I still have 5 ounces of it left, but it's so weird to think about. I'm still on liquids, and today I ventured and had 5 ounces of a protein shake. It was delicious.

 

I truly am blessed to have such a wonderful support system. So many people have reached out to me and I promise you, I can feel the prayers and good vibes coming my way. My family has been well fed, thanks to some great friends, and the calls and text messages are so appreciated. My team at work sent my beautiful flowers yesterday and they really brightened my day.

 

Please continue to send those prayers and vibes Tom's way. This has been a tough week for him and yesterday he proved his badassery (is that a word?) 



Dawn Ray of Sunshine's Mail Bag

I’m completely overwhelmed. As I have read through the Facebook comments, messages, personal phone calls and texts I received (and even the hallway conversations at school and work), I have been touched by the outpouring of support, love and encouragement I have received from so many amazing people. I have to say, I never expected it would reach so many people and would strike such a chord.

I wrote that blog post mainly for me—writing helps me process my thoughts and since I’ve struggled with this for some time, I thought it would be cathartic for me. I had no idea it would help others. I’ve heard from so many kinds of people-- those who are currently and have struggled with the same food issues or similar food issues, those who have had the surgery (or some type of bariatric procedure) done in the past, and those who were just touched and supportive of me. I’ve heard from family, friends, former co-workers and bosses, best friends, fellow BCS school moms and sports moms, fellow former daycare moms and casual acquaintances. I’ve been called brave and strong. People have told me they are proud of me, will be praying for me and will be my cheerleader. I’ve been thanked for my candor and transparency for bringing a private issue into the conversation. I’ve even been called a badass (best. compliment. ever.)

 Frankly, I can’t help but feel a bit selfish as I look back on this post. I It has gotten a lot of attention, and it wasn’t intended to do that, but it has made me realize a few things:

·         I am not brave. To me, people who overcome things that are beyond their control are brave. I’m scared to death, but I know I can do it.

·         People can be awesome. (Sure, they can also be assholes but this post has restored my faith in humanity and people.)

·         Lots of people struggle with food and weight issues (and not just overweight people.) Yes, even those skinny mamas I see wearing tennis skirts and those running shorts. I know they work hard to look good, even though they may struggle like I do. (Y’all know I love my skinny mamas!)

·         What an awesome tribe I have. Family, friends, everyone, from all over.

·         My husband is even more of a saint than I thought. Yep, I know y’all are shaking your head right now agreeing with me. I mean, here I am, putting my personal weight struggles up on a blog for everyone to see. This will be a huge life change for him. Y’all pray for him too!

 I’ve also been getting a lot of questions (which I appreciate) and other comments, so I thought I would attempt answer them. Kinda like Dawn Ray of Sunshine’s Mail Bag.

What kind of surgery is it?

I am having gastric sleeve or a laparoscopic sleeve gastrectomy. You can google it, but essentially, here’s what you need to know. They take out approximately 70% of your stomach and leave you with a “pouch” for a stomach. The result looks like a “sleeve,” hence the name. My new stomach will be MUCH smaller than before – much like the size of a child’s stomach.

Is it permanent?

Yes, once they remove my stomach laparoscopically (through my belly button), they can’t put it back in. Ain’t no turning back once it’s out!

Wait, what?

Yep, you heard me correctly. That’s what they do. If you want to see the surgery for yourself (I personally HAD to watch it!!!) Then here you go… (WARNING! It is VERY graphic and shows the actual surgery from the inside of the body as it occurs.) You may have seen more graphic things on Grey’s Anatomy, but consider yourself warned.

 But you don’t look like you need this surgery.

Bless your heart. That’s so sweet (and dumb/naïve) of you.  I do. Trust me.

 You can’t possibly be that much overweight that you need surgery?

Again, bless your heart. I need to lose about 100 pounds or more according to my BMI (I haven’t set a weight target just yet.) And trust me, they won’t do this surgery if you just need to trim up and lose a few pounds. It is for the morbidly obese (and yes, as much as I want to cry typing that phrase,  I am considered that.)

There is a range that you have to meet in terms of your BMI to qualify for this surgery. I am on the lowest range, but I still qualify. (That means I’m fat enough for the surgery)

 What’s the recovery like?

If all goes well, I will be in the hospital for one night only. Then I will be home to recover. I will be off work for three weeks. You are welcome to come enjoy some broth with me. I plan to have many flavors.

 So what can you eat after surgery?

For the first two weeks, I will be on a liquid diet (mostly broth) and then slowly transition to a pureed food diet and then to soft foods. After 8 weeks, I will be able to transition to a low fat diet. (You know, the kind we should all be eating anyway.)

You don’t need to do something so drastic, you just need to exercise and walk more, or eat less.

I realize this statement is coming from a place of love and concern, but no shit. We all need to walk and exercise more and eat less. (and I’ve heard this multiple times and I realize no one means any offense.)

Isn’t this taking the easy way out?

Is that even a question?

What can I do for you and your family?

Mostly, please send good vibes and pray for not only me, but for my family – all of us. This will be tough on everyone but I have vowed to make this as seamless for them as possible. So yes, if we have plans that revolve around food, the Ray Family will still be there. I just may be drinking my broth or some protein shake. (I also may not come right at first, so please don’t be offended.)

Can I bring your family dinner?  

This is such a true display of Southern hospitality and love, one for which I am immensely grateful. I have had several people ask if they can and it is honestly hard to say no. (I’ve tried saying no and some of our friends just weren’t having that answer.) I will have plenty of meals from Hope’s Dinner on Demand stocked in my freezer and Tom is an excellent cook. But if you want to bring Tom and the boys something, we would greatly appreciate it. Please just coordinate with either one of us after I’ve been home a few days.

 

Again, I am overwhelmed at this support. You are all badasses.