I am the epitome of uncomfortable-ness

I'm not even sure that is a word, but you catch my drift. I am 32 weeks pregnant and can't get comfortable. I go to the doctor next week and I am sure I am measuring more than 32 weeks. I am also sure this will be a big baby. (Come on! We are not small people, so we won't have a small baby. Tripp weighed 9 pounds 2 ounces when he was born!)

Anyway, I am thankful to have a great husband who is doing almost everything around the house right now. He tells me, "you go sit down. you need to put your feet up." And I am taking advantage of his helpfulness. Thanks, Tom!

My mom has also been extremely helpful. She has been helping with laundry and the ironing (which I detest).

It's hard to believe that in 7 weeks we will have a new little bundle of joy (and also a little bundle of poop, pee and crying.) Big brother is excited about what's in store, and can't wait to meet the baby. Since we don't know the gender, we are excited about guessing what it is. Although frankly, I am tired of guessing. I just want to know!

Never before...

Never before have I been so pleased and thrilled to see 2 teams lose. If you know me pretty well, you know I despise the Univ. of Tennessee. Equally so, I don't like that coach of theirs, Bruce Pearl. (To give him some accolades, he has done a tremendous job at UT, even in the face of some legal troubles of his players on New Year's Day.) Of course, you know I loathe John Calipari (I actually loathe the fact that I let him dupe me and so many other Tiger fans with his "chip on the shoulder" snake oil, but I digress.)

This weekend, Tiger fans all across the country rejoiced when Kentucky was beaten by West Virginia. And if you have been a Tiger fan for long, you know how difficult it is to root for West Virginia. Not because of their players, or the Mountaineers' Jerry West history, but because of their coach, Bob Huggins. The fact that Memphis fans are rooting for Bob Huggins just shows how much we feel we were wronged by Coach Cal.

You see, we've always hated Bob Huggins. He was the Cincinnati coach for a while and Memphis and Cincy were fierce rivals. He recruited thugs to play on his team and he even called the Memphis fans "obnoxious." Which started a t-shirt and sign campaign about being an OBNOXIOUS TIGER FAN. Anyone still have one of those shirts??

So, for us to actually ROOT for Huggins says a lot. I've actually been watching WVU a lot this season and have really grown fond of their team. I picked them to win it all! (granted they are the only team in the final four that I have picked in my bracket, but still.) Huggins' players make mature and strategic decisions while on the court, and don't seem to have any issues off the court. And Da'Sean Butler. Just call him Mr. Clutch. He has hit the game winning shot within the last few seconds for 6 of their games. Expect great things from this kid!

Seeing Coach Cal with that look of disappointment on his face was a thing of beatuy. Is it wrong to revel in someone else's misery? If so, then I am wrong...

For Tennessee to lose the very next day was also a joy to watch. Credit to Bruce Pearl and his team for making it to the Elite Eight for the first time in the school's history. I'm just hoping this means Pearl gets a better offer at another school and takes it. That way, we won't have to see him in that God-awful day-glo orange blazer, and we will be rid of him. (yes, a tad bitter becuase they have beaten Memphis since he became Coach. I can admit to that.)

Anyway, the Final Four is set and there is a #1 seed, a #2 seed, and 2 #5 seeds. Should be an interesting tournament.

The Magic of April 5th

Spring is in the air. There's a certain energy and excitement surrounding this particular day on the calendar in 2010. It is opening day of Major League Baseball (long awaited by the Ray Family, might I add.) The 2010 NCAA Men's Basketball Championship will be played in Indianapolis (though we aren't sure who the two teams will be, it will be an exciting game, nonetheless.) Tiger Woods will conduct a press conference for the first time since crashing his Escalade in November. Wait.... what?

Yep, Tiger Woods announced yesterday he will be conducting a press conference open to (shocking!) media in the days leading up to the Masters. Interesting timing, don't you think? Hmmmm, let's see. MLB will be all over the television. CBS will dedicate hours of coverage to the championship game. Hundreds of media outlets will be in Indy covering the game. Sounds like a great time to host a press conference to me.

Four Words I Never Thought I Would Say

Thank you, John Calipari. Seriously, I mean it. I'm not supposed to post about Coach Cal anymore (my husband thinks I should just let it go, and I am getting there,) but sometimes I just can't help it. Allow me to explain.

Thank you, John Calipari, for bringing the Memphis Tigers basketball program to national prominence

Thank you, John Calipari, for hiring Josh Pastner as an assistant coach. He has been an excellent addition to our Tiger family and has made us proud to be Tiger fans. He is a first class coach and human being, and we love having him on our side. He did an outstanding job this year, considering you took everything with you to the Bluegrass State. (Well, everything but an NCAA investigation.)

Thank you, John Calipari, for taking your "one and done" recruiting style to Kentucky. That way, we can root for a fantastic team each year and not have to begin worrying if our star players will be back for another season. (Sorry, Kentucky fans, we went through it with Derrick Rose and Tyreke Evans and you have to rebuild every year. It's tough.)

And lastly, Thank you, John Calipari, for blowing a 9 point lead and not calling a time out in the 2008 national championship game against Kansas. It hurt at the time, and I still have issues with it, but in the long run, it has been better for us Tiger fans. You see, it is much easier to vacate the wins, great tournament run and a Final Four appearance, versus a national championship. Right, UMass fans? (Calipari did the exact same thing at UMass: left amidst the NCAA investigation and ran for the hills of the New Jersey Nets, leaving UMass to pick up the nasty pieces. He, of course, was unscathed.)

On behalf of Tiger fans everywhere, we thank you, John Calipari, for making it easier to digest the NCAA-imposed vacated wins and Final Four Appearance/National Championship Runner Up. It may be the way in the record books, but we will remember how much fun that season was: for the university and for the entire city of Memphis. And in some strange way, we have you, John Calipari, to thank for that.

I am graphic design challenged....

Yes, that's right. If you are a regular reader of my blog, you will notice I have changed the layout 10 times. And they have all been horribly designed. So, I have enlisted the help of my fabulous husband to help me. So, hopefully soon, I will have a fantastic design for my blog, courtesy of Tom Ray. :)

Hooray!!!!

You know it is bad when your PR flack quits...

So the hub bub continues about Tiger Woods and his “image.” Last night, they even aired a special interview with Tiger – his first on camera appearance since the scripted statement in February in front of a select group of friends. I didn’t see, but I have read several recaps about said interview. Which, I might add, was only 5 minutes and he stood up the entire time. (Nothing says comfort like standing up talking instead of sitting down on a nice comfy couch.)

Interesting timing, don’t you think? His interviews were perfectly timed with the health care reform vote—something the majority of Americans was glued to. Gotta believe that timing was intentional. (Somehow, I think more people would have watched Tiger’s interview had it not been the same time as the most historic health care reform vote ever.)


Even Ari Fleischer didn’t want to work with him anymore. And who can blame him, really? An email from Fleischer to several news outlets today confirmed he is no longer working with Woods. Hmmm, does Tiger think he is out of the woods? Does he think his latest interview with ESPN and the Golf Channel has helped him so much he doesn’t need PR representation?

I found the transcript for the interview, and noticed a few interesting parts. And in Ray of Sunshine fashion, I thought I would break it down for you…(note: Rinaldi is the ESPN interviewer.)

Rinaldi: For a lot of people, the spark of those bad things is Nov. 27. Early that day, what happened?

Woods: Well, it's all in the police report. Beyond that, everything's between Elin and myself and that's private.

Rinaldi: Why did you lose control of the car?

Woods: As I said ... that's between Elin and myself.

Rinaldi: If it's a private matter, why issue a public apology?

Woods: Well, I owe a lot of people an apology. I hurt a lot of people. Not just my wife. My friends, my colleagues, the public, kids who looked up to me. There were a lot of people that thought I was a different person and my actions were not according to that. That's why I had to apologize. I was so sorry for what I had done.

PR translation: I HAD to publicly apologize. I could never return and make oodles of money at golf unless I said I was sorry. Plus, I’ve always had great PR representation who succeeded at making the world believe I was a good person. Life was a lot more fun then.


Rinaldi: You said you were in treatment. The simple question is, for what?

Woods: That's a private matter as well. But I can tell you what, it was tough, it was really tough to look at yourself in a light that you never want to look at yourself, that's pretty brutal.

PR translation: I got caught and had to go. Rehab is the “in” thing to do these days. Look at Britney.


Rinaldi: What'd you see?

Woods: I saw a person that I never thought I would ever become.

Rinaldi: Who was that?

Woods: Well, I had gotten away from my core values as I said earlier. I'd gotten away from my Buddhism. And I quit meditating. I quit doing all the things that my mom and dad had taught me. And as I said earlier in my statement, I felt entitled, and that is not how I was raised.

PR translation: I saw a person my mother was ashamed of.


Rinaldi: Why not seek treatment before all of this came out?

Woods: Well, I didn't know I was that bad. I didn't know that I was that bad.

Rinaldi: How did you learn that? How did you learn it?

Woods: Stripping away denial, rationalization. You strip all that away and you find the truth.

PR translation: I learned it by stripping away stuff. After all, strippers helped me become the man I saw, so I thought stripping away at denial would help me find the truth. Trust me, stripping away clothes with strippers was MUCH easier.


And to be fair to Tiger Woods, he did admit he was wrong and hurt a lot of people. He also apologized to his wife, mom, family and fans.

Rinaldi: I ask this question respectfully, but of course at a distance from your family life. When you look at it now, why did you get married?

Woods: Why? Because I loved her. I loved Elin with everything I have. And that's something that makes me feel even worse, that I did this to someone I loved that much.

Rinaldi: How do you reconcile what you've done with that love?
Woods: We work at it.

PR translation: I’ve been with so many women now, no one else will touch me, so I’ve got to convince her to stay. And, she is beautiful.

I hope to not write about Tiger Woods anymore, but when he opens the door, I have to go in (figuratively speaking, of course.) I wouldn’t touch him with a 25-foot pole.

Jesse James needs a good PR writer...

Is anyone surprised at this Jesse James nonsense? I certainly am not. The man was married to a porn star for Goodness sakes (note to all the porn stars out there reading my blog--it is your business if you want to be a porn star, not mine, so go right ahead.)

But our sweet, funny, beautiful Sandra Bullock? For that skanky looking woman? Seriously, Jesse, what were you thinking? Yes, I know you are loaded with tatoos and like motorcycles and other fast things (perhaps that's why you "allegedly had an affair" with the self-proclaimed "bombshell.") More like "train wreck," but whatever. She certainly isn't America's sweetheart like Sandra. Trust me, you've gotta see this girl. And I am not opposed to tattoos. I know lovely people who have many tattoos and I don't discriminate because you choose to be inked, but what you don't see in the photos is this woman has a tattoo on her forehead that reads, "Pray for us sinners." Classy.



Now Jesse is no different than any other celebrity. He has women throwing themselves at him on any given day and I certainly understand there is temptation, but when you get married, you have to resist that. And if you screw up, which many celebrities as well as regular people often do, you have to accept your actions, apologize and move on. So, Jesse James, I commend you for apologizing to your lovely wife, Sandra Bullock, but I have to question your written statement. (If Tom issued me a written apology, it better be accompanied by a LOT more, I'm just sayin'...)

As I love to do in my blog, I have decided to translate your statement.

"The vast majority of the allegations reported are untrue and unfounded. Beyond that, I will not dignify these private matters with any further public comment.

Translation: I slept with "the Bombshell" on more than one occassion. I just cant resist a totally tattooed woman. She was so classy, Sandra, I just couldn't help it! I mean, one of her tattoos says Pray for us sinners... so i thought, Hey, she's gotta be a good girl if she is praying for me.


"There is only one person to blame for this whole situation, and that is me. It's because of my poor judgment that I deserve everything bad that is coming my way.

Translation: I didn't really confess in the first part of the statement, but this should tell you that I did it. I'm sorry I got caught.


"This has caused my wife and kids pain and embarrassment beyond comprehension and I am extremely saddened to have brought this on them. I am truly very sorry for the grief I have caused them. I hope one day they can find it in their hearts to forgive me."

Translation: I am embarrassed that I got caught, I thought I was more discreet than that. And I hate that this has come out after my beautiful wife just received her first Academy Award. The timing stinks for her. And me, because I got caught...

Jesse James, you're not so bright. But here's my advice to Sandra Bullock, there are plenty of great men out there that won't cheat on you with those kind of women -- or any other kind of women. My husband is one of them. Niw, I don't want you coming to Memphis and sweeping him off his feet, but you are at the top of his Top 5 list, so I would have to let it happen. But I will certainly put up a fight...

Hang in there, girl.

Return of the Tiger Ticker

Wow. Thanks goodness it’s back. I thought I couldn’t live another day without it. As I settle in to watch basketball last night (as I do excessively during every March,) I see it looming on the bottom of ESPN. The dreaded “Tiger Ticker.” Seriously? This again?

Sure, I heard the news that Tiger Woods is returning to the Master’s in April after his “self-imposed” break from golf, but really, the Ticker again? Aren’t there more important things to dedicate that little portion of my screen to? Let’s see: the NIT; the NCAA tournament; the women’s NCAA tournament; MLB (which is beginning its season in a few days); soccer; the NFL combine; NASCAR; NCAA men’s wrestling tournament; Erin Andrews and her stalker. Anything really. Anything but this.

I realize I haven’t written about Tiger in a while, so I thought I would wax poetic about him once again. I read his statement and have a few comments about that (see below.) But before I get into that, let me answer a few of the pressing questions the media is throwing at us today about Tiger.

Q: He’s was spotted with Elin over the weekend. Are they back together?

A: No, it was a photo op, folks. Good PR people put them together for the media everyday. Tiger just hired one of the best PR folks around—Ari Fleischer (former press secretary to Pres. Bush.) Quite a coincidence, don’t you think, that this photo emerges over the weekend and his statement about the Masters comes out on Tuesday? Not really.

Q: She wasn’t wearing her wedding ring. What does that mean?

A: It means she’s holding out for a bigger one, like Kobe Bryant’s wife. (Get it girl, then dump him!)

Q: Will she stay for the kids?

A: Why is this concerning the media? Those kids are very small and need both parents right now and it is their business. End of discussion.

Q: Is he finished with his therapy?

A: Don’t even get me started about “sex addiction.” As my husband says, when you are single, it is called playing the field and sleeping around. But when you are married, you are allowed to say you suffer from sex addiction. Whatever! You can’t keep it in your pants (and that goes for ladies, too. I’m not discriminating, here.) It is called cheating. You slept with a bunch of women and you are married. Not to mention they were gross women. (you definitely have a type, Tiger.) Be honest, deal with it, move on.



Of course, Tiger won't get on camera and talk to someone, he has to read his statement. So, as a good PR person, I decided to dissect his statement for you and translate it into what it really means…..


"The Masters is where I won my first major and I view this tournament with great respect. After a long and necessary time away from the game, I feel like I'm ready to start my season at Augusta.

Translation: the timing for my “comeback” was perfect. My PR strategist, Ari Fleischer, decided the Masters would be the best time for me to come back. Besides, the sponsors and media need me. The Masters will be so stuffy and boring if I am not there.


"The major championships have always been a special focus in my career and, as a professional, I think Augusta is where I need to be, even though it's been a while since I last played.

Translation: I have a big ego and I think I will win the Masters this year and show everyone that my sleeping around with skanky women has not affected my golfing capability. Plus, I need more money to buy Ambien. Oh, and the skanky women will be coming out of the woodwork to sleep with me and I can’t go back to the 12 or so women I was having an affair with. They think I’m disgusting now.


"I have undergone almost two months of inpatient therapy and I am continuing my treatment. Although I'm returning to competition, I still have a lot of work to do in my personal life.

Translation: my beautiful wife won’t let me touch her and I have to focus my energies on something physical.


"When I finally got into a position to think about competitive golf again, it became apparent to me that the Masters would be the earliest I could play. I called both Joe Lewis and Arnold Palmer and expressed my regrets for not attending the Tavistock Cup and the Arnold Palmer Invitational. I again want to thank them both for their support and their understanding. Those are fantastic tournaments and I look forward to competing in them again.

Translation: I have embarrassed the entire game of golf and some of the greatest golfers who have stood beside me. I felt I owed them an apology for not playing and likely costing them millions of dollars. Plus, Ari Fleischer told me to call them.


"I would also like to thank the Augusta National members and staff for their support. I have deep appreciation for everything that they do to create a wonderful event for the benefit of the game."

Translation: Augusta National begged me to come back. No one wants to see the Masters played by a bunch of old golfers. They knew if I played this year -- at the height of my downfall – it would make more money for them, the sponsors, the networks, hotels in the area, etc. Oh, and also me. Because I have a big ego and I can win the Masters again. And I need the money for more strippers, girlfriends and Ambien. Also, more sex addiction rehabilitation. Hopefully they will send me somewhere with hotter chicks this time.


So there you have it, what I think about Tiger. Let's hope ESPN gets rid of this Ticker. It is interrupting my basketball coverage.

Baby Names

We're getting closer to the debut of Baby Ray (about 10 weeks if all goes well) and thus we have begun the process of naming baby. A couple of Tom and Dawn guidelines before I move forward:

• We will NOT name him/her before he/she is born
• We won't call him/her by a name while still in the womb (we're weird that way)
• We are naming a person, not a baby
• We are narrowing it down to a list of 3 names for each gender
• We aren't telling anyone our final list of names (people can be downright rude about names!)
• Each person (Tom and Dawn) will have 3 vetoes to exercise per gender . These vetoes don't have to have a reason.

Now that I have spelled out the rules, please allow me to vent a bit. This naming business is hard work, particularly the second time around. Seems like with the doodlebug, we knew what our names would be. Our lists were pretty cut and dried and truth be told, we were 95% sure if our baby was a boy, he would take the family name. A girl likely would have been different. We each only exercised one of our vetoes and we were ok with that. But this time, it is much more difficult.

Even though it wasn't confirmed, I knew in my heart that our first baby was a boy. I thought about girl names, but really didn't give it much thought. I didn't feel I needed to. This one, however, I'm not sure what this kid is and therefore don't know what to name him/her.

I know what you're thinking-- come on, Dawn, this is easy. Just pick a name and go. But if you know me, you know I overanalyze things, and this is no exception. But I don't see it as overanalyzation. I see it is an important "detail" that affects and shapes one's life. I'm a firm believer we are not naming a baby, but a person. Sure, I don't want the child to be one of 3-5 kids in the same class with the same name, but I don't want him/her to go through life constantly spelling his/her name. (Like my friend Roxane, one n.)

To help me solve this, I have created a series of tests to see if any names we are bouncing around fit my criteria:

• The 40-year-old career man/woman test: this test is fairly self-explanatory, and is of course, subjective. Essentially, you ask yourself, would a 40 year old career man/woman have this name and be taken seriously. Examples: Jane would be a name that withstands many ages and she would be taken seriously as a career woman. Tallulah Belle--not so much.
• The Yell Test: suggested to me by my friend Pam, this test is exactly what it sounds like. How does it sound when you yell it? As in, the kid is 14 years old and didn't take out the trash after you told him 100 times...
• The Graduation Announcement Test: how does the full name sound when announced over the loudspeaker at high school graduation? Does it sound like a kid ready to take on the world? Or does it sound like a kid that is still attached to mommy and daddy?
• The Athlete Name Test (over the Intercom at say, the World Series): Now batting for the St. Louis Cardinals, your shortstop... #8... Sequoia Ray. Silence falls on the crowd. Did that guy just say Sequoia? Isn't that a tree? Or a Toyota SUV? What the heck kind of a name is that.
• The 4-year-old test aka the Tripp test: This isn't what Tripp thinks of the name, but mainly what he thinks of when he hears the name. Case in point: Sasha. Mom: "Tripp, what do you think of the name Sasha?" Tripp: "I like it. I will call her Sausage!" Thus ended the running for the name Sasha.
• The Tooth Fairy Test: this is essentially what the child's name would sound like when he/she says it after losing a bunch of teeth, as kids are prone to do. You don't want your kid saying his/her name with no teeth and it sounds like an expletive. Just sayin'.
• The "was she/he a slut/jerk in high school/college/other parts of your life test?": Whether you want to admit it or not, this is a legitimate test. It was the source of one of Tom's vetoes the last time. I have always loved one name, Tom hated it because of someone he knew, he vetoed. Case closed.
• The "how the name sounds with a thick Southern Accent" test: Mainly I am talking about my sweet Mom here, but also, about other folks here in the South. I'm a Southern girl and probably always will be, but that doesn't mean the kid's name has to sound weird coming out of a Southerner's mouth. For example: Michael is a very well-respected, well-rounded name. But put it in mouth of some deep Southerners, and it becomes "MY-kull." I can't take it.
• The "which one are you again?" test: everyone knows this test. There are 5 Dakotas in your kid's class. So they become-- Dakota A., Dakota S., Dakota John, and so on. Boy we make it hard on teachers sometimes.

Anyway, I realize I maybe should have bigger things to worry about with a baby on the way, but this is the source of most of my thoughts when I have free time. It will be interesting to see where we land and what this kid's name is. Probably after all of this, I will name him John. Or Jane.